how do i survive?
by Ellayaha
Summary: go easy on me it's my first ever gosomethings wrong with raven pairings:rae rob
1. me

I am Raven.

The only use of my life is ...well...there isn't any. All I want is to get a little respect but what do I get, a load of rubbish.

So there I am, walking the same route I do every day but this time it's different; I hardly recognize it. I enter, only to hear bb and cy argueing(again).Robin making his stuff shiny. And Starfire, greeting me but I don't hear her.I have more important things to do. I sit down looking at the same sight I do every day but it's different. I go to the roof excpecting to see the same thing I do everyday, but no nothing, just darkness, darkness not that strange. I concentrate; empty my mind; leave nothing.Then suddenly life gushes through me I resist the urge to scream but i cannot help it. Calming down no longer need anything.

"What do you want, traffic light"I added that last bit on purpose, to make him mad, to make him go.

"Raven, you ok?"

"Whadda you care?"

"ok, bye then."

" No wait!"I couldn't help it I had to keep him.

"yeees?"

"Err close the door on the way out!"

"ooook,"

And he went. I don't know why i'm like that in front of him but I see it as a warning.

A warning for what?

well...

* * *

whadda ya think?

reveiw please


	2. Chapter 2

well...

I'm being followed. What it is and why it's doing this, I do not know. It haunts me then, at the most calmest of moments, it jumps up and fills my head with misery. It's almost like my father the 2nd.All it does is destroy my calmness. I raced down to my room, hoping to find out something about it, for the, what was it again, oh yeah, 87th time.

knock knock

Before opening the door i knew who it was, the bird(no offence to me).

"What?" I monotoned.

"Err R-R-Raven?"Robin stammered.

"What?" I replied.

He entered."I, umm need to tell you something."

"What?" I said, hopefully for the last time

"I...you...love..."

"What?"I repeated again.

"I love what you did to the wall downstairs!"he quickly added, then shot out of my room.

I think he outspeeded the Robin itself. I needed to know what he meant so I decided to investigate for myself. I teleported to the island of wich the titans tower was on. When I got there my eyes were closed. It had taken an unuasally long time. When I found enough energy to open them, I saw a truly disturbing sight. On the wall, in great big capitals, it said:

i luv u robin

luv rae!

Immediatly I knew who had done it. Well not who but what. I quickly re-arranged the bricks so that no-one could see what it actually had said. It was more like:ial rob invuuu are! While teleporting back to my room I made a name for my poltergeist. C.A.R.M.P.. C is for calmness wich it destroys. A is for activity of. M is for madness and P is for poltergeist. You might think I missed out the R but no thats just my least favourite so I'm going to mention it last. R stands for Robin. This is only because it has become obvious it knows my feelings for Robin. WHAT AM I SAYING? I have no feelings for Robin. Why am I thinking this anyway?

When I asked myself this question I realized I was in Robins room._ Stop mentioning his name, _I thought to myself. I could hear him coming, so I made the decision to hide, and I did. I raced to his closet and closed it on myself. He came in. I peeked at him from a tiny crack between the closet door and the wall. He came up to the closet door. He stood and stared at what seemed like me. I paniced. What if he _was_ looking at me. What if he knew I was there? What if he was just standing there to torture _me,_ to annoy _me,_ to actually _make _me panic. All this and thousands of more questions circled in my head and made beads of sweat evolve from my skin. He made a move. Lifted an eyebrow. He looked around his very own neat, tidy and normal bedroom. Then he stopped. He started to stare at me again.(well as I said before what _seemed_ like he was staring at me.) Then he made his move. He reached out and opened his closet's door.


	3. Y

**_"Y"_**

"hmm which uniform shall I wear today? Oh, I forget their all the same! Hehehe,"Robin started "Err, Raven...?" His voice weared out. "Oh its just the puppet of her that beastboy put their when I told him I like raven. What? I don't like Raven. What? of course I like Raven, she's my friend!"

Meanwhile, in my room, yes I managed to get back, I lay on my bed and wondered about carmpy. I like adding a "Y" to names. Of course, you couldn't put a y on the end of robin. y(and no that's not a typo) that would make Robiny. Budum chshh. Anyway going back to my dear carmpy. Hmm "My dear carmpy"

could make a song out of that. #_my dear carmpy you are so ... so ... err .. oh right you are so Robiny# _Whaty Iy justy couldn'ty thinky ofy anythingy elsey.

yep I dedicated a whooole line to my wonderful y. Take away a y off each letter and you'll get a sentence. _Oh I wish I knew who you were! A_s soon as I thought this I haerd(yes that is a typo) a knock at the door. Who could that be?

* * *

a/n

HOPE YOU LIKED IT i THINK YOU KNOW WHO IT IS BUT IS IT?

aNy WaY pLeAsE rEvEIw please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please PLEASE! (YOU BETTER)


	4. the 1st disruption

the first distruption.

The door opened."How did you get in bird breath?" I said, eyes still closed

"err, it just err, opened I guess..."

"How did you get the key?"

"How did _you know _that I got the key?"

I opened my eyes and replied, very sarcastically, "I'm syhcic."

"No, really."

"This has been my room for over two years, I think I know how it opens."

"Uh, yeah right."

"Sooooooooo, what dya want?" I asked hoping he would have forgotten by now.

He gave a seriously confused look "What do _I_ want?"he said even more confused "oooooooh right, ahem. Raven you seem a little, err,"he paused, probably trying to find he right words"You seem a little, well how should I say it, disturbed and..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, weather I need any help, need to talk all that kinda stuff, well thanks Robin, but no I don't!" and with that I pushed him out and closed the door. I lay down on my bed closed my eyes and sleep embraced me with welcoming arms sooner than you can eat a pringle.


	5. the 2nd disruption

plz plz plz plz plz plz plz r&&&&&&&&&&r don't forget da second r. and i no its a rubbish story but i wont continiue if ya don't reveiw u dont hav to say its great u can even say its bad points but just tell me wat ya think. (rubbish threat aswell)

The 2nd disruption

When I woke up, well I didn't wake up, I got woken up, by a loud loud sound and a sort of bump. I went out to see what it was when I discovered I didn't need to go out. My bed had exploded. I guess sleeping is a calm moment aswell. I had a list of things not to do so Carmp doesn't annoy me. Some of them even deprived me of my emotions. Here it is:

1.meditate

2.empty my mind

3.be happy (see)

4.laugh

6.(ladys and gentleman welcome the latest recruit) sleep

Stupid innit. But I gotta do, what I gotta do, even though I'm not gonna do it. And here it comes, (ladys and gentlemen boys and girls hold onto your seats) number 5 which, very sadly, turns out to be love that proves to be severely hard having Robin around me more than half the time. What? Is it wrong for a half-demon, with her father being the most evil thing in the whole universe, she trying not to show her emotions and to control them to a very high point to fall in love? Well every sane person that actually has a brain would probably say yes it is wrong; But then again, there are those that are really hippy like, and really fond of love that would say no; She should be able to love even if, she was exactly like her father. Anyway, I finally managed to make myself beleive I'm in love with him,which is kinda a silly thing to say; Well with Starfire with him 24/7 it is and, thanks to Starfire, I see him happy with her, and that kinda makes me wanna back off. But, it doesn't matter coz, I can control myself, and anyway nobody knows(I hope).

Forgetting that. I was begining to find out somethings about C(carmp). As you shouldn't know I am seriously in love with my bed so carmp should know me pretty well. But also he(or she but I'm gonna call it a he) must hate me very much to destroy my prized possessions.

Right after this I heard shouting coing from the commen room. Yep they were soooo loud I could hear them from my room. Outside the room I could just about make out who the shouting was coming from, so I decided to go somewhere I couldn't really be seen but I could get a great veiw of them; Or should say a great veiw of...


End file.
